page 19

[green]

Mikey finds Gerard in the art room after school. He's in no hurry to leave, so he
sits back and watches Gerard work.

Gerard has paint in his hair, which is sticking out in all directions. He looks the part of crazy artist pretty well. Mikey feels his heart clench. He loves his brother so much it nearly hurts sometimes.

“So what are you working on first?” Mikey asks, leaning against the wall.

“The Howling,” Gerard says. “Did you want to get home right away?”

“No rush,” Mikey says. “If you're in the middle of something...”

“I can't paint anymore right now,” Gerard says. “I'm not really feeling it. I think I'll have to watch the movie again, get in the right mood for it.”

Mikey smiles. “That could be fun.”

“Do we still have it? I can't remember the last time we watched it.”

“Yeah, we usually go for the zombie flicks,” Mikey points out. “But I think you might have The Howling in one of the piles under your bed.”

Gerard's got whole cities under his bed. It'll take forever to find if it's there.

“Probably,” Gerard says. He puts his supplies away carefully, then smiles at Mikey.

“So, did you meet anyone today?”

Mikey shrugs. He'll make friends eventually, but for now he'd rather spend time with his brother.

“I should introduce you to some people,” Gerard says. “Like Bob, or Ray. You'd like them, I think.”

“Any friend of yours,” Mikey says, and it's the truth. Gerard is his barometer – if someone is cool with him, they're cool with Mikey. It's the assholes who don't like Gerard that Mikey knows to stay away from.

Gerard stares at the half-painted canvas, like he's looking for what isn't there, and Mikey stands beside him and rests his chin on Gee's shoulder.

After a minute, Gerard sighs and reaches up to touch Mikey's hair. It's just a comfortable, familiar touch, but it makes Mikey swallow hard. He's not sure why.

“Okay, let's go,” Gerard says, and leads Mikey outside to his car.

Gerard's car is small and cramped, but it seats five if you don't mind sitting practically on top of each other. Gerard drives like a lunatic, but Mikey is used to it by now. They're home before Mikey knows it.

Gerard goes straight to the basement and Mikey follows.

“Want to help me look for the movie?” Gerard asks, and Mikey shrugs. They both get down on the floor and start searching under Gerard's bed.

Mikey pulls out a bag of chips, two porno mags, five comic books, and about twelve video games before finally getting to the movies. They're in a pile, stacked up as high as they'll go in the small space, and Mikey pulls them out.

“I didn't know we had the Road Warrior,” Mikey says, going through the movies. “Oh, here it is. The Howling.”

Gerard grins at Mikey. “Want to watch it now?”

“After dinner, I think,” Mikey says. He didn't eat lunch and now he's starving.

“Mom's working late tonight,” Gerard says. “There's something in the crock pot.”

They go upstairs and look in the pot. It's some kind of meat with potatoes, carrots, and what used to be onions but are cooked down to mush. They both fix plates and Mikey grabs two Cokes from the fridge for them.

“So what do you think of your classes this semester?” Gerard asks.

Mikey shrugs. “I'm taking Drama.”

“Easy A,” Gerard says. “I took it last year.”

“Does it involve a lot of getting up in front of the class and … I don't know, acting?”

“Sometimes,” Gerard says. “Mostly it's an excuse to talk. I drew a lot during Drama, and sometimes I did homework. The teacher isn't strict at all.”

Mikey nods and eats his food. Everything is tender and his mom must have seasoned it because it's delicious.

“What time is Mom getting in tonight, do you know?” Mikey asks.

“Probably after nine or so,” Gerard says.

They finish eating and go out on the back steps to have a cigarette. Their mom lets them smoke in the house, but sometimes they like sitting outside. They sit side by side, and Mikey leans into Gerard a little. He's tired – the first day of school took something out of him. Nothing big really happened, but sometimes Mikey gets stressed over little things.

“You okay?” Gerard asks.

Mikey shrugs. He knows he doesn't have to explain. Gerard wraps an arm around him and Mikey sighs, leaning in close. Gerard smells familiar and comforting.

They finish their cigarettes and put them out in the can that's beside the door for that purpose. Then they make their way downstairs to the basement and Gerard pulls out the sofa bed so they can both lie down while they watch the movie.

Half way through The Howling, Gerard gets animated again. He points to the screen and Mikey smiles, knowing his brother has found his inspiration.

“This painting is going to be awesome,” Gerard says. Mikey knows it will be. Everything Gerard puts his mind to is awesome.

Mikey stretches out, closer to Gerard, until their sides touch. Gerard is warm and solid, and Mikey wraps an arm around his waist. Gerard rolls on his side and moves closer, so that Mikey can put his head on Gerard's arm. Gerard kisses Mikey's hair, and it's so nice, so comfortable.

They watch the rest of the movie like that, and Mikey – full of food now, and as comfortable as he gets – dozes off. Gerard doesn't move off the sofa bed, just keeps holding Mikey gently.

Mikey smiles, then moves closer so that his face is pressed against Gerard's neck. The next time he wakes, no light is coming through the high basement window and Mikey knows it's late. He should probably get up and go to his own bed, but Gerard's got a tight hold on him in his sleep and Mikey doesn't really want to move. Sometimes he feels like he lives for these moments, when Gerard and he are in each other's arms, safe and warm.


page 33 Go upstairs to sleep
page 34 Stay in bed with Gerard